Anne Keothavong blog: An emotional 48 hours...
Anne Keothavong
Related Articles
Featured
Rosco blog: the '09 review and the '10 preview
The world No.50 doubles player looks back on his 2009 season and reveals news of a new partnership in 2010
Latest Category Articles
Match day – Tuesday – started off normally as any other match day would. I had breakfast, hit and then got a light bite to eat before my match. I was obviously nervous, but I get nervous before every match so that wasn’t out of the ordinary.
I was eager to get out there and give my best against Patricia Mayr and hopefully walk away with the win, but unfortunately that didn’t happen. I felt like I got off to a decent start, I was in control early on and felt good enough to beat her.
The British crowds are a bit reserved – maybe there should be free alcohol for all fans!
As the match wore on though she hung in there, she made me play a lot of balls, the errors started to creep into my game and I guess I got a bit tentative. Looking back, I probably started to doubt myself when I should have been a bit more aggressive, but it’s easy to say that in hindsight.
I felt the match slipping away and I kept fighting but I wasn’t putting the ball into the court enough and if you don’t do that in tennis you lose the match.
Straight after the match I was naturally very disappointed. It’s Wimbledon, I wanted to perform but nothing went right for me and I was very upset.
I thought I was fine going into the press conference, but when that question came along – I think it was about whether I thought I’d let anyone down – I couldn’t hold back the tears which was pretty embarrassing!
It’s weird because I wouldn’t describe myself as someone who cries a lot! The last time I cried was when I lost love and love to Safina at the French Open, but after that kind of drubbing I think I was allowed to! It’s like I’m doing all my crying inside the same month! Having said that, I’m sensitive, I’m human – I’ve got feelings.
You’re playing for yourself out there but I’m the sort of person who likes to please other people and sometimes I feel like I’m not just doing it for myself, I’m doing it for other people – everyone wants to see a British player through to the next round.
I thought to myself, ‘This isn’t good, I don’t want to cry my eyes out in front of everyone!’ so I asked the moderator (I think he is a member of the All England Club) if I could leave and he nodded. I briefly left the press conference – just for a couple of minutes – and while I was outside in the corridor the moderator was very kind and told me to take my time. He told me to try to remember what I’d achieved in the last 12 months and offered lots of kind words.
He did say I didn’t have to go back in if I didn’t want to but I wanted to face up to the press so returned after a couple of minutes of re-grouping to finish the questions and that was that. It would have been easy to have walked away but I lost my match and I wanted to deal with the consequences.
Since then I’ve had loads of nice messages and texts although I haven’t got back to most of them which I apologise for! I heard the clip of me crying was shown on the BBC that afternoon and, to be honest, I think it was a bit insensitive. I guess it makes good TV…
The next day me and Sarah Borwell played our doubles against Sam Stosur and Rennae Stubbs which we lost two and three. It was always gonna be a tough match – Sam and Stubbsy are Grand Slam champions and very experienced.
Although we played well together in Eastbourne, Sarah and I couldn’t reproduce that form and we knew we needed to be at the top of our game to have a chance of winning. They were just better than us – simple as that.
Next it’s the mixed doubles with Ross Hutchins – we’re not playing today so I’m having a day away from the courts. We play Bruno Soares from Brazil and Alisa Kleybanova from Russia in the first round. Soares I know plays lots of doubles and Kleybanova I’ve played before in doubles – she’s a strong girl who gives it a whack so it’ll be a tough match.
The events of the last 48 hours don’t dampen my enthusiasm for wanting to get out there and play another match at Wimbledon. This is the first time in my career that I’ve got into all three events on merit without the need for any wild cards and I’m proud of that. I’m looking forward to giving my best out there and hopefully we can do well.
Hopefully the crowd can get behind me and Ross because I thought they were a little mute during our doubles yesterday. The Aussies were getting more support than us Brits! I’ve played at all the other Grand Slams now and the crowds in France, Australia and the US get right behind their players. The home players are put on big courts and the people get really into it.
Here, it’s a bit more reserved – maybe there should be free alcohol for all fans! People can be so quick to criticise the British players and get on our case but where are the people who want to get behind us? You hope they’re out there somewhere. If you happen to be at Wimbledon when we play on Friday or Saturday find our court and make some noise!
Anne
X
Fans' Comments
Add your own remarks below
Paul Baird Jun 25, 02:49 PM
Just showed you care Anne, whether it ends up doing the rounds on youtube or not.
Chin up – at least you can make amends Stateside away from the SW19 pressurecooker!
John Sullivan Jun 25, 03:20 PM
You don’t get to the top 50 by being a bad player. Can you learn anything from your defeat before putting it behind you? I hope so, because you’re good to watch, good for British tennis and good enough to get into the top 30.
Stick with it kiddo.
Robert H Jun 25, 09:13 PM
Anne. I really believe you have helped to put things into perspective recently. You are an individual plying your trade week in week out usually without Any interest from the media or British public. Unlike the prima donna soccer players who hide behind their team mates when they make mistakes and still get paid obscene amounts even if they lose every week. You are the best player in Britain and have earned that right. You also wear your heart on your sleeve and are not scared to show your emotions when things go wrong and until people are prepared to follow your career week in week out and begin to hurt a little when you lose and feel great when you win just like watching your football team every week, then I wouldn’t worry what ‘the bandwagonners’ think. Your family, team and regular wellwishers are all that matter. Let’s keep moving up the rankings and take comfort in those who smile and cry with you.
James M Jun 25, 09:22 PM
It’s only one tournament out of many. There’s plenty of opportunities to make amends for yourself coming up. You can do it- I have faith in you.
As for the journalists, their jobs only exist to criticise others and you’re a damn sight better at what you do than they are at what they’re doing.
Michael Drinkwater Jun 25, 11:23 PM
Wimbledon is psychologically tough. I wonder if you feel there is anything you can do to toughen yourself in your game, Anne? You and several of the other British women have improved a lot in the last year, but at the critical phases of matches, it seems to be when your confidence falters. I wonder what your own ideas are of how you can turn around this phase of your game?
Duncan Jun 26, 12:15 AM
Some of the reaction to the results of British players has been pretty disgusting and I also thought it was pretty insensitive to show the clip. But then if they hadn’t we wouldn’t have heard the tone of the insidious question you were asked.
It looks like the worst bits of the British psyche I noticed when I moved here at 16 years ago are still around. The British sense of entitlement, criticism of others and the jealousy of their talent. I think the school system in this country produces people with such low esteem that they’re constantly looking for the flaws in other people. A look at the BBC Message boards tells you that. Comment after comment by people doing Andy Murray down. If he’s not your favourite player then fair enough but if you keep posting messages about it then it ‘s obviously a sign of something else. It just makes people feel better about themselves to find fault in others.
But you’re not a public servant, you’re not playing for Britain. You’re trying to win tennis matches for your own career. The LTA gets some government money but that’s supposed to be for grassroots tennis and anyway it’s a two way street They get plenty back from their investment.
So enjoy your career for yourself. A lot of us have been following your great results, often without any help from the main media outlets who don’t cover your successes.
The last thing you want to do is to give British fans more alcohol. :) Actually I get a small sense of pride when British crowds give the other player a fair go. It’s nice sometimes to hear them cheering some good play from the other guy instead of cheering their double faults like they do elsewhere. Sometimes, though, it does look like they get a bit nervous themselves and transmit that to the player on court. It’s like they need the British player to take charge and release their inhibitions for them Pros and cons I suppose. It goes to my earlier point. British fans don’t have the self-esteem or confidence to emerge from their shell and show some passion, probably because it’s systematically taught out of them at school. Don’t rely on them would be my advice :)
All the best, good luck in your next match….
Jake Jun 26, 06:49 AM
Anne,
You’re a thousand kinds of awesome and have achieved an incredible amount over the past year. Third round at the UO, semis in Warsaw, I don’t have to tell you. Anyways, I’ve been following you since you were young ; thought it was cool that GB had a good junior (you and Bally) as it had been a while.
You’‘ve had so many ups and downs especially with injuries and stuff, so as someone who’s followed you for a long time, this past year has been wicked fun to see. Eff the press, it’s been twenty some years since there’s been a Brit lady in the top 50 so those monkeys can suck it!
Peace,
Jake
Mark Williams Jun 26, 07:12 AM
I think the question about letting people down was absolutely ridiculous and really quite pathetic. You clearly didn’t lost the match because you didn’t try hard enough and didn’t give it your all – you just lost a tough match – and with knock-out tournaments like this you only have to have one off day and you’re out. To say that amounts to ‘letting people down’ is sensationalist and entierly unfair – it makes me quite angry. You have clearly done incredibly well over the past year and should be very proud of that.
Good luck in the mixed and with the rest of the season.
S&V Jun 26, 10:49 PM
Hang in, sport is full of ups and downs and you are too good to let this hold you back
Matthew Jun 27, 01:53 PM
Showing that clip was insensitive. I hate the english media.
I like many others love to support the British players at Wimbeldon.
Just do you’re best which I’m sure that you do, and we’ll be behind you on every stroke!
Ignore the media – We love you Anne! You could never let us down!
Anne Jun 27, 07:41 PM
Thanks to those who posted kind messages, appreciate it…
Caro Jun 28, 04:49 PM
Anne, It’s very normal you were disappointed after your loss. It shows how much Wimbledon means to you and how much you wanted to make the crowd happy. You always play with such a great attitude and you worked so hard to overcome all these bad injuries in your career. That’s why you’re in top50 now. I don’t think you let someone down with your loss in the first round. On the contrary, I’m sure your breakthrough inspired the other British girls to move up in the rankings. These journalists seem to follow tennis only two weeks in the year. They must be ashamed of blaming a girl who did so well this year. You won so many great matches and reached three semifinals at WTA-events, so one bad loss in the first round is not the end.
I always love to read your blog. I appreciate you want to share not only your good moments, but also these bad experiences. Good luck for the rest of the season!
David hardisty Jun 28, 10:13 PM
Anne I do not want to say “never mind”, because you do mind. I want you to realise that if you have got this high, you can go higher if you believe in yourself more, the difference between no. thirty and no. fifty is as much self belief as natural talent. Just believe in yourself and go for it.
WorldCitizen Jun 29, 04:16 PM
Hey Anne,
You did what you could. Pressure is a tricky thing . Even the best players struggle at home. We have our Amelie Mauresmo here who, despite being a former #1, has played poorly in Rolland Garros year in and year our and always seemed to recover in Wimbledon. I hope you do the same, and come back stronger in the US OPEN, and in your future events.
Best of luck from your #1 french fan!
Chris Jun 30, 04:43 PM
Would just like to say that lots of us Brits support you and that you have the potential to be one of the best British women players for a long time. I thought the press and TV coverage you received was completely over the top considering how fantastic you have done this year in establishing yourself as the top British woman and I hope that you keep this up and give us all something to cheer for.
On the crowds not supporting Brits enough at Wimbledon, I totally agree. The difficulty to get tickets means that some of the most enthusiastic supporters of tennis can’t always get courtside to cheer our players on. Fair play to the yellow-shirted Aussies for supporting their players, but I hope that next year you get lots more vocal support out on court and hopefully you have a great run in the Championships and show the stupid newspapers that British women’s tennis is really making great strides.
Mark Jul 1, 01:02 PM
Its just the media being idiots as usual. You have had a fantastic year – top 50.
The media do these things on purpose. You should try and think of some witty remarks to counter any sensationalist questions. Good luck for the rest of the year!
Next tournament in the UK – I’ll bring some Anne fans with T shirts, beer and lots of positive cheering!
Dave Jones Jul 2, 01:34 PM
You should be very disappointed. If you don’t start performing at the Majors your career will go down as a failure.
Maybe spend less time partying and a bit more time practising and you might do alright
Andreas Schluter Jul 3, 08:26 AM
Never mind,love! I think you are great!
Kirk Jul 8, 04:11 AM
Dave Jones your an a-hole..
Best of luck, Anne
Chris Johnson Jul 10, 11:47 AM
Crying is as natural an expression of emotion as laughter and simply demonstrates the depth of your feelings. Nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about. Keep plugging away and doing your best and you will be just fine. Ignore the naysayers, their opinion doesn’t matter.
Chris. X
Carl Jul 14, 02:15 PM
On to the US hardcourts, and you should be proud to be in these upcoming tournaments on your ranking. Until the US Open, you’re defending no points from last year, so just play your tennis without pressure in the States, and every result will be a plus.
Steve Jul 17, 07:20 PM
The British fans were reserved because you were shit!
You symbolise all that is wrong with British tennis!
Comments closed